Shine Bright Like Erudite

When I asked my brother (who had just finished reading Divergent) what faction I would be, I was surprised that he didn't suggest that I would be Erudite. My younger brother has the tendency to go on irritated tangents about how 'smart' I am, how 'highly' our parents seem to regard me compared to him and our other siblings.

Because I have swag like that (whatever swag is...) I usually dismiss him. I brush my hand in the air and then through my hair and tell him that I just study and manipulate situations to my favor (see my Candor post). I'm no smarter than anyone else. Anyone who thinks they're not smart are dumbing themselves down.

But am I an intellectual? Do I constantly strive to know how the world works? Do I want to be an astro-physist?

No. Not really. And I can't say. Though, being an astro-physist sounds really cool.

But I'm pretty sure that the only reasons I well in school are for insecure, very non-abnegation reasons such as:

1. I'm very jealous when it comes to others succeeding. But I try to see how/why those people got there and try to emulate them.

2. I don't like to look bad. I look bad without trying, so I'm not going to look bad at my own hand. Even if I personally prefer to be lazy. You know, until I get bored.

I do not actively pursue all knowledge. I am not Erudite.

Why are you taking my picture? I am supposed to be planning a hostile invasion. Ahem, I mean studying.

But everyone has the potential to learn something--to be intelligent--if they want to. Intelligence comes in many forms. And everyone has taken that test in middle school that tells you what type of intelligence you are. I tested highest for mathematical-logical intelligence.

 Hostile invasion....I mean, math...

But my feelings for math range anywhere between neutral and the occasional pure hatred for the subject. I prefer reading, writing, and music far more. But I am a very logical person. I am a little bit more reasonable than I wish I was, and I always tried to act smarter than everyone else when I was a young girl. Now I'm just trying to be me. Whoever I am. And you should try to be the smartest you. You decide what that smartness is. Smartness is a word, right?

Big book of diseases + hipster glasses = erudite swag

Don't Mess With Me. I'm Dauntless.

SEE. I told you I'd post about Divergent!

Putting my sick obsession aside (which could only mean me bringing it out...) I mentioned that I was tie in how discipline is related to choices. And choices is a strong theme of Divergent. 

So I made some choices today. I woke up on time. Did math even through I really didn't want to (discipline!). And got dressed.

And when I walked to the mirror in my dinning room to examine myself, I couldn't help but stand frozen, mesmerized at myself. No, I am not self-absorbed. Well, not that self-absorbed. 

Anyway, it wasn't me that I found particularly impressive. It was my outfit choice. I had subconsciously chosen my faction. And that faction was Dauntless.

You really wanna mess with me, pansycake? 

Naturally, I did the un-Dauntless thing after I came to this conclusion, which was squealing at my reflection internally and trying to act cool for the rest of the day. I tried to do that eyebrow narrowing, squint thing that hardcore people like Four and Tris are capable of, but because it's me we're talking about, I looked more like Christina, and it came out more like this:

You scared, Peter? 

And this: 

What about you, Four?

                                      

Personally, I don't think the last one was that bad. But all in all, everything was in good fun. And as I still wear my dauntless-inspired clothing to type this post, there are three important things I feel should be considered and accepted:

1. Your choices define you. But you also define your choices. It's your homework to decipher what the latter means. Clue: It's all in this post. And sometimes the clothes. 

2. Oh my gargoyles, I have to dress up as every other faction and post it on my blog! And don't worry, I don't feel foolish, because this is just way too much fun. Because as we all know, I should be doing my math homework. Thank heavens for choices, right? I might be feeling Erudite tomorrow...

3. Veronica Roth is one of the most visionary-badass-creative people on earth. Don't pretend you don't know who she is.

Dauntless out. 

Discipline, and Other Things I Don't Have Time For

I hate math.

I hate math because I could be writing. And when I could be writing, I could be happier. And when I'm happier, I'm not stressed. And when you're stressed, you die a premature death.

I do not want to die a premature death.

So instead I expel all of the annoying negativity in my life with this face. It's pretty, isn't it?

I am the master of my mind! Wait, why does it feel like it's exploding?

The point I'm trying to make is that we often have to do things we don't want. And even when we are doing things we do want to *cough* work on the CR manuscript *cough* there are still things I have to do that I don't entirely want to.Like writing out certain scenes. Research. Math.

I don't think that I hate anything, but often its easier to point out what we don't like verses what we actually like and want to pursue.

So push on, even if you don't want to. Because most of the time you have no choice.

But we'll talk about choices if I discuss Divergent.

Sigh. Discipline, remember?

When I discuss Divergent.